December – Hold the Date

The parashah to be read on the Sabbath of December 6 is called Va’yYishlach, You will find it in Genesis 31:4-36:43. When we read the text for the first time, it may appear to us that this week’s section merely tells the story of how Jacob and Esau reunite. Yet even a superficial reading teaches us something about the psychology of Jacob.  The reader learns of his high state of anxiety. Jacob finds himself in a (self) struggle with the mysterious “ish” by the banks of the River Yabok. The result will be not only a change or name but also a change of heart.

An alternative reading of the parashah takes us to deeper and perhaps more hidden themes. For example,  the parashah revolves around the concept of “ger.”  We may loosely translate the the Biblical term “ger” as a “legal alien” or someone who is in a society of which he/she is not a part.

Jacob’s describes himself as a ger “Im Laban garti/I have been a ger in Laban’s home” (Gen. 31:5). In other words no matter how successful Jacob was in a foreign land, he was never at home.

We do not have to be abroad to be a ger.  How many of us are “gerim” (plural of ger) even in the land of our birth?  Jacob’s battle then is to go from being a “ger” to a ‘toshav” (the opposite of ger: the person who is at home with him/herself). To become a “toshav”, to be at peace, with himself, Jacob would have to cross the River Yabok. He would have to fight a battle with the ish (perhaps himself); he would have to go through a process of struggle, and he would have to learn the meaning of contentment and self appreciation.

We saw an arrogant young mane when Jacob left Canaan. Now in this week’s portion with his return, we see a mature adult.  He has come to count his blessings, and even more importantly, he has come to realize that we are all “gerim” resident aliens on earth. While living with his father-in-law Laban, Jacob has learned a series of important lessons. He has learned to appreciate what he has and not to take anything for granted.  He has learned that it is easier to demand of others than it is to fulfill his own commitments. Perhaps most importantly, Jacob has learned that as gerim (guests on earth), a successful life means learning to be thankful for what we have rather than being envious of what others have.

Like Jacob each of us needs to realize that we are all gerim, that no one is really at home, that all of us are guests on G’d’s earth.  Do we take time out to appreciate our blessings and seek, with a sense of humility, to be thankful for all we have or do we live with the twin curses of jealousy and envy of what others may have?  Have we learned to confront our anxieties and to face fear with hope and determination?  Have you crossed your own River Yabuk, are you ger or finding your way to becoming a toshav?